In brief, I wrote a poem some late night a while back, and here it is. I found it again just now in the jumbled files on my computer. It has a meaning, or I mean to say, a history. Much discussion and contemplation has revealed one of the great puzzles of human life. One can pour everything into a person, an activity, a dream, a desire, but if God does not take foremost place in life, then the passion is misdirected and draining on the soul. This can be a danger for anyone, and as a creative person I realize that the power of an imagination can be twisted around for a demeaning purpose, rather than an uplifting or an inspiring one. While I must say this discourages me, and disappoints me (I would like to have it that the things I love dearly could not have a bad side to them, but they do), this understanding ought to be used to advance the resilience and strength of character. It is a challenge, yes. But it is a worthy one at that.
Aand, here is the poem:
Here in the quiet hush of night
I listen, wondering if you shall speak
I would that my thoughts take flight
And drowsiness drop from its peak
And then it be us alone, your spirit in mine
Mine dwelling in yours alone
Till my soul ‘comes a thing You refine
Not repulsed by Satan’s undertone,
His device, called Doubt or Distraction.
A struggle ever onward, life’s mark
You gave me a mind, it clouds with abstraction
And even vivid reveries are stark;
Barren without you, appearing in them.
I shut you out with my door I think
But you step around it, into my life so dim
Anguished, annoyed, away I shrink
To repulse you, afraid of facing doubt.
My own doubt, or yours? I can’t be sure
But it must be fear, existing without
You brings it on, giving room for worldly lure
Finally I turn and say hello, you sit
Beside me and we rest, sudden light breaking
How well it feels, how finely you befit
My Reality, my Truth, and I find myself forsaking
Everything else. For you. Nothing belongs
For you narrow the road and pluck
From my hands what should have long
Vanished, out of soul, out of mind. You tuck
Away fears, angers, tatters of an empty life
Empty without you.